Seriously though, I’m all for facing your fears, and I do it on a regular basis. It’s pretty goofy for a horror author to have fears, but everyone does, even the masters. Stephen King is afraid of spiders, the number 13 and balloons. H.P. Lovecraft was terrified of fish. Alfred Hitchcock’s greatest fear was eggs. What do I fear? Well…surprisingly very silly things when you think about it.
5: Bees and their Keepers
Play Metal Gear Solid 3, they said. It will be FUN, they said.
This anime film is based on the Kouga Ninja Scrolls book? Awesome..oh wait-NOIT’SNOT!
Oh god, my childhood horror, it’s coming back to me!
To put it lightly, I am extremely terrified of insects of the bee, wasp, hornet, and yellowjacket persuasion. For a time when I was younger, it used to be so bad that even cartoon pictures of bees would scare me. It became very unhealthy, and to this point, mostly everything involving bees scares the everloving CRAP out of me, even if it is in an acclaimed animated film or as part of a fantastic video game. So how did I develop a crippling fear of bees? I stepped on one when I was a little girl and had to be driven to the hospital so the still squirming monstrously huge hornet could be pulled from my foot. Although my severe melissophobia has slightly diminished over the years, these things STILL scare me. The only exceptions to the rule of bees = scary are Ah Muzen Cab of SMITE, (one of my favorite characters) and Nicolas Cage. The worst out of all of these examples though is The Pain from Metal Gear Solid 3. Whereas with Ninja Scroll, Candyman, and other examples, I could just leave the room and it would go away, you HAVE to defeat The Pain to progress with the rest of the (fantastic) game. I ended up making a close friend do it as I put something over my face so I couldn’t see it and cried. Of course, this being an actual legitimate phobia, I had to put it at the bottom of the list. Bees are scary and deadly, guys! It’s totally not funny!
Basically, the fear of talking to strangers, (especially important strangers) over the telephone. Despite being a confident woman, I suffer from the fear that I will somehow be judged over the phone, or flub up on my words, or forget something. It is here that we edge into the “Boy, Beck, you sure are pathetic” territory. I admit that this is a really stupid thing to be afraid of, but many important things can rest on a phone call: a relationship, a job, your future. It just makes me a little apprehensive. Strangely, when at work, I have no problem calling people and taking messages, but at home when a strange number calls my cell phone or I have to call someone different on it, I freak out a little.
I’m 23 and I don’t drive. Why? Well, it’s actually more complicated than you would think. I fear being in control of such a large machine that is capable of destroying someone. It’s like a constant string of what ifs. What if I hit a deer? What if I hit a person? What if there is a bee in the car and I need to drive? What if someone cuts the tires? What if? What if? WHAT IF?! The one time I practiced driving I almost ran over my parents’ toolshed if that tells you anything. To me, driving is like being put in control of a giant robot. Said giant robot can be helpful, but it can also screw up someone else’s life. Sheesh I’m an idiot.
2: Flume Rides
My parents and friends consider this the stupidest thing that I am afraid of. I literally know of no one else who is afraid of these and am constantly called ridiculous and dumb for being terrified of them. My parents LOVE log flumes and when I was young, they had no choice but to take a terrified, shaking, screaming child on with them. They seemed to think that pulling my hat over my eyes so I couldn’t see and constantly talking about how we were going to “make a splash” was somehow effective. It wasn’t. The reason why these things scare me SO much is, unlike roller coasters, you are not strapped in at ALL. I would always fear falling out and falling in the water and nobody coming to help me. Stupid, I know. Oddly enough, I LOVE water slides.
And the Number 1 Most Ridiculous Thing that I Am Afraid of Is…
1: King Ramses from Courage the Cowardly Dog
To put into perspective just how TERRIFYING this thing STILL is to me after so many years, I jumped when the pictures came up on Google’s image search, and a gif version made me scream like a little girl. Its eyes, its mouth, its creepy ass arms, its lack of legs. EVERYTHING about this creation is wrong and the creators of Courage the Cowardly Dog knew that they were going to scar children for LIFE with this. This is the thing that even -I-, the person who is irrationally afraid of it, consider to be incredibly stupid to be afraid of. It’s a cartoon mummy with a creepy voice and bizarre movements, why am I scared of it? Why after so many years does this thing still haunt me? It’s SCARIER to me than most horror movies. Hell, this guy is right below bees on my shit-bricks-o-meter. The sad thing is I’ve tried to move past this fear so many times, but it still freaks me out. I’ve even considered talking to my doctor about it, the doctor that helped improve my melissophobia and is an amazing person to talk to, but I know that even she would think that this is completely ridiculous.
So those are stupid things that scare me. Next up on the blog I will discuss a fantastic anime that is sadly overlooked by many and considered to be many things that it is really not.